Q: Are you a Jew?
A: I might be!
Q: We know if you're a Jew!
A: Fuck. I thought I could fool you. Who is a Jew?
Q: We know who the Jews are.
A: Who are they?
Q: People. Jewish people. Who worship a strong masculine God, or choose not to do so, strongly.
A: Awesome. Why are you a fucking asshole?
Q: It may be connected to my being a Jew. Then again, I might just be an asshole. Why are you an asshole?
A: I'm an asshole because you made me one, Jew!
Q: You're funny. You should do stand up.
A: Fuck. Do they pay you for that?
Q: If you're good.
A: Tell me a good Jew joke.
Q: You tell me a good Gentile joke.
A: Okay, this Gentile walks into a bar and says "Where are all the Jews at?" The bartender points to the corner where there's a pretty young woman --
Q: Already, the bartender should be shot. You never identify a Jew.
A: Anyway, he points to this woman, and the Gentile goes over to the woman and tells her: "Honey, I'm thinking of having my foreskin removed." And she says: "But you'd still be a goy!"
Q: That's the joke?
Q: Not funny.
A: Okay, well tell me a Jew joke.
Q: Okay, so this Jew, he walks into a Jew bar.
A: He walks into a Jew bar?
Q: Yeah, it's a bar for Jews.
A: Okay. Is this during the Nazi occupation or something?
Q: That's not funny.
A: Sure it is.
Q: No, you are offensive. I'm not telling the joke now.
A: Come on.
Q: Okay, so he walks into the Jew bar. And he says to the bartender: "Jaime, give me the usual." And the bartender turns around, lowers his trousers, and moons the Jew. And the Jew says, "Jaime, what's the matter, I wanted a double!" He's only got one ass cheek, you see.
Q: His ass, it's only half an ass.
A: That's a Jew joke?
Q: Well, I am a Jew and I told you that joke.
A: That's true!
Q: So, what is this business about Jews burning books? We do not burn books. Gentiles burn books, like they burn Beatles records. Insanity.
A: So, a Jew never burned a book, ever?
Q: Only to keep a holy Torah from coming into the hands of the Nazis. Then, it is permitted to burn it.
A: What if the Jew is an asshole and he just likes burning books by NEVER LETTING THEM GET PUBLISHED.
Q: So, you are Anti-Semite. You believe in the Worldwide Jewish Conspiracy.
A: No, I just think Jews do still run large segments of the entertainment and publishing industries.
Q: So, that's a crime?
A: No, you're just assholes about it.
Q: Fine, fine. Complain, complain, all you do.
A: Yes. Kvetching.